There's quite a lot of things I really want to do in life, and I've been trying to work out recently how to make them compatible.

For example, I want to be able to speak French and Spanish to the same level as German. This requires taking some more classes, of course, but mainly actually going to live there. So I want to go live in France and Spain. I also want to go to New Zealand, at least for a month or so, because it's where my Grandad and half my other relatives live, and I'd quite like to see them all again whilst I've still got a schedule that involves lengthy holidays.

I want to get married, and have kids - I know this is a pretty old-fashioned concept these days! On the other hand, it's the one thing that, when I think about it, I am absolutely certain I want it, which compared to career/study plans is a pretty rare thing for me. I'd like to do it some time before I'm 30, or at least the getting married part. I want to have a long and happy life with someone! (Hopefully Trev. That would be nice).

I want to sing, and perform, in front of lots of people. So this requires a band, and actually writing some new songs, and getting some gigs. It means flying to London the day before exams, to have a photoshoot, so that I have a chance of getting on German TV (photographer guy works for ZDF, a TV channel over here, and thinks he can get us in somewhere).

I want to live with Trev, as soon as possible, because I'm sick and tired of feeling like I'm walking on eggshells in my own flat - I want to live with someone I know I can live with, because it won't feel like we're no longer friends just because I haven't cleaned the bathroom. I want a flat with a cool clock in the kitchen and matching towels and crockery and a cat :)

I want a job that I either love so much I don't care if it takes up my life, or a job that I enjoy when I'm there and can come home and forget about in the evenings. It seems to me that that means, for me, either being a successful musician (rare, hard, but worth the effort trying to get there if you make it), or working in the music industry/broadcasting in some sort of role that requires creativity and logic in equal measures, which suggests something like marketing, producing (if in broadcasting... I don't have the skills for the music side!), managing so long as it's not accounts or something like that, presenting, being the person who finds new bands... etc.

The trouble with being a student (and I know I really have no right to complain, but I'm going to anyway, even if it is a pretty cushy lifestyle most of the time) is that you can never switch off, or at least if you're me, or Trev, you can't. There's always one more thing you could learn, one more book you could have read, and if you're not doing that but going out or sleeping or playing the sims or staring at the wall instead, there's a niggling sensation of guilt/stress at the back of your mind that just won't go away. OK, maybe this is just me... so maybe second person approach wasn't such a good idea, but you know what I mean. I want a job where that doesn't happen. So no academia for me, I guess! Which tells me that doing a masters is probably not a good idea, since if I did one it would be for the sake of it, not because it was necessary.

So how are these things compatible? A plan has been emerging in my mind over the last few weeks/months, as to how all this will work. At first I thought maybe I could get an internship in the music industry this summer, but I don't even have a three month gap in between finishing at the Humboldt and starting back at King's, so that's a no go. So now the plan is: Stay in Germany until September, getting an easy-going job in a bookshop or something over the summer - no more telesales!! Then in September, live with my sister, and maybe Trev, but in the house I was living in last year so a student set-up, not a couple-y set up. But still, living with people who I know I can live with, and who have a similar attitude to their surroundings as me. Then, once I've graduated, go to New Zealand in the summer for a month, possibly with Lisbee (my sis). It'll be the winter there, but for one thing that'll mean flights are cheaper, and for another it means motels etc will be cheaper, since we would want to travel around a bit, not just stay with my relatives the whole time.

After New Zealand, move to the south of France for a year with Trev. During the rest of this year and my final year, take French courses to perk up my language skills, and then do an intensive course out there for a month (like I did here in Berlin in September). Then both of us get jobs, rent a flat, live on the coast and generally learn to speak good French and enjoy life, whilst still doing OK jobs so it looks alright on the CV.

Come back in the September afterwards, or maybe slightly before, and look for a 6 month/ year long internship within the music industry or broadcasting. Preferably paid! Get a flat (maybe even buy a flat - I have a wonderful savings account which will give me a 100% mortgage if I want it), preferably in somewhere green and leafy but still within commuting distance of jobs (ie London, in all probability), and do all the flat stuff with Trev :)

After that... well, who knows. But that makes some of it compatible/doable, at least. And obviously, if band stuff takes off in any big way then the plans change :) But I am open and easy, I just like to HAVE a plan, but it doesn't have to mean it's the plan that will actually happen. Still, if it all works out exactly like that, it would be nice!